Recognizing signs of stress in infants, toddlers, and preschoolers

Our world is filled with stress, and children navigate a constant stream of activity, distractions, and challenges that can cause stress. Recognizing the signs and triggers of stress is essential in providing the support they need.

Signs of stress in infants (0 to 12 months)

• Excessive crying
• Irritability and fussiness
• Changes in sleep patterns
• Feeding difficulties
• Clingy and need for physical contact
• Withdrawal from social interactions
• Changes in facial expressions indicating distress or pain

Signs of stress in infants (1 to 3 years)

• Tantrums, meltdowns, or outbursts
• Regression in developmental milestones (like bedwetting or thumb-sucking)
• Changes in sleep patterns
• Changes in appetite
• Clingy or separation anxiety
• Physical complaints of stomach aches or headaches
• Social avoidance
• Aggression or defiance

Signs of stress in preschoolers and older children (4 to 12 years)

• Shifts in academic performance
• Irritability
• Mood swings
• Physical complaints of stomach aches or headaches
• Withdrawal from friends or social activities
• Changes in sleep patterns
• Changes in eating habits
• Anxiety
• Difficulty concentrating

How parents can help children cope with stress

Recognizing signs of stress in children is the first step in providing support. The next step is to support them in managing that stress. Here are some ways to help your child cope with stress, based on their age:

Stress management: Infants (0 to12 months)

• Maintain a consistent routine
• Provide physical comfort
• Set up a calm environment
• Monitor and respond to cues of distress

Stress management: Toddlers (1 to 3 years)

• Offer choices to give your child a sense of control
• Maintain routines
• Provide plenty of opportunities to play, relax, and decompress
• Use positive reinforcement for coping behaviors

Stress management: Preschoolers and older children (4 to 12 years)

• Encourage open communication
• Help your child identify and express emotions
• Promote physical activity
• Teach relaxation techniques (deep breathing or meditation)
• Provide a supportive environment

Coping skills to destress

Coping skills are strategies children can use to manage big feelings, anxiety, and stress. These skills are important because they help children regulate their emotions and stress response, build resilience, and confidently navigate challenges. Here are some examples of coping skills to help destress:

• Breathing exercises (balloon breathing, teddy bear breathing, roller coaster breathing)
• Sensory grounding exercise
• Create a special box where children can "put away" their worries or stress
• Teach simple, affirming phrases like "I can do this" or "I am brave"
• Physical activity helps release tension and produce calming hormones (jumping jacks or running in place)
• Drawing or coloring
• Create a quiet corner with books, pillows, and a comfort object
• Blow bubbles

When to consult a pediatrician

If your child's stress interferes with daily life (school, friendships, sleep) or if it causes frequent meltdowns or anxiety, it may be time to seek professional guidance. Stress that leads to physical symptoms (like stomach aches and headaches) can also be signs that further evaluation and additional support is needed. If you notice these patterns, consult your pediatrician for advice on next steps and potential resources to help your child manage their stress effectively.

If you have questions about childhood stress, reach out to your local or Summer Health pediatrician for support. Summer Health is a pediatric telehealth platform offering 24/7 care, providing answers for everything from urgent concerns to everyday questions about your child’s health.